I came across the pie charts on Facebook recently and reminded me of how important to slice a pie in our life, parent’s life From the very beginning. Pie and parenting.
Let’s imagine that your use of time is a pie. Your 24 hours or 7 days a week is a whole pie.
When the baby comes home and we, the parents, are the one to keep the baby alive by feeding the baby and all the care, it feels and is for some time that our time should be devoted 100% to the care for your baby. and if we are not doing that, we often feel “guilty”.
So a lot of parents get in the trap of “use 100% of my pie to my baby and cross finger I will survive this new born phase”.
The underline assumption is that “to be a good parent, you should be devote your 100% or more to your baby”.
Is this real? Is this sustainable?
I don’t think so. And I know so from having two kids.
Because, you know, the parenthood would not be over in few days. It continues for good 20 years.
Here is the alternative underline assumption to keep mom and baby happy and have sustainable parenthood That I want to propose.
“I am a human with needs and wants. To function well as a parent and as a partner and as me, I need to make sure my needs are met too”.
So we need to slice a pie. We need to make sure we keep a sliver of a pie for ourself without feeling guilty. It is necessary health task, much like washing hands after using bathroom or drink water when you are thirsty.
In the beginning, maybe that sliver for you is so thin that it may not stand on its own on the plate. It is okay. It is a start. As your baby grows, your sliver can grow bigger.
Oh by the way, speaking of a pie, Pi day is coming soon. Match 14th. What pie would you get? I am thinking traditional apple with vanilla ice cream.