• Keiko Yoneyama-Sims

That forbidden word?  Is it really?


That word. That forbidden word from motherhood. Selfish. 

Is that so?  Is it that bad to be selfish? 

Being a mother requires you to give, give, give. Give your time to baby. Give a nutrition of you are breast feeding, give away your sleep to feed and change diaper dirong the night, give your physical movility and freedom to carry a baby and to attend baby's need. 

Mothers give a lot.  And a lot of time it is labeled "selfless act". And it is praised and valued and admired. 

I want to break that image. 

I want that every mom feel free to have that word in their tool box and use it free from guilt. 

You maight have read or heard the phrase "you cannot pour from an empty cup". It is to make you pay attention to how you are doing and to encourage a person to take care of self. 

I think it is truely fit to motherhood. 

And to that, I want to add, you need to attend to your cup before others. 

It is because you need to make sure your cup is doing good before you move on to pour to another cup. 

I am not saying here that don't pick up a baby during night so that you can get your sleep. Or don't feed your baby unless you eat first.  No! 

I want to say here is that please do not dismiss your needs and wants just because having a baby too far away.  Honor them and attend to them. 

 Please feel good about attending to your needs and wants. 

It is more than okay and allowed that you watch your favorite movie instead of doing dishes at the end of a day to relax. Take a trip to a book store in stead of park.  

It maybe is not adding new activities. It can be just what you pay attention while doing the same daily routine.

Take a shower and actually enjoy warm water running instead of worrying and hurring to get it done. Pay attention to what you eating actually, the smell, the color, the texture, or the flavor instead of paying attention to how many bites baby have had and how clean baby's bib is. 

Incooperating your wants and needs in daily routine are as important as you incooperating baby's needs too. 


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Last Updated on July 9th, 2020